Date Rape Essay Example for Free

Date Rape Essay Introduction Popular views on commital of rape are confined on the idea that a stranger, the supposed perpetrator settles on a secluded or dark area and forcibly attacking someone, before inflicting sexual contact. While this may appear to be true, it is now a basic reality that rapists aren’t just strangers. Even people we know: friends, acquaintances, relatives and co-workers are possible suspects. In fact, about half of the victims of rape know their perpetrators. Incidences of commital of the crime seemed to be alarmingly high as it comprised fifty to seventy-five percent of all accounted rape cases. But even these data do not speak of the actual figures. The University of Buffalo’s Student Affairs cited a conservative FBI statistics which provided that only three and a half percent of all forms of rape are reported. By examining and analyzing available results, this paper tries to answer questions surrounding date rape, which as follows: a) What is date rape?, b) How did it evolve?, c) What are its causes?, d) What are the risks factors?, and e) What are the necessary interventions? Anwering these questions would enable us to provide the necessary information regarding date rape. Definition and history of date rape Of the cases reported, majority of it appears that the perpetrator is a victims’s acquaintance. While it is assumed that most of this acquaintances, ranging from friends and acquaintances to dates, romantic partners, and spouses or domestic partners do not necessarily end up in violence, in certain instances and causes, rape happens. For this study, when forced sexual intercourcourse takes place between two acquaintances, it is called date rape or acquaintance rape (Homeier, et al., 2006). Date rape, on an initial public sense, is defined to be a subset of acquaintance rape where two people involved in a romantic relationship engage in nonconsensual sex. But in the case of acquaintance rape, relationship (romantic or professional) has no bearing of the situation; hence, it can be described as plain and pure sexual assault or unwanted sexual contact. The law refers sexual assault to include the commital of rape (oral, anal, or vaginal intercourse) or the force penetration of any foreign objects in the genitalia (dildo, vibrator, including finger) without consent from the victim. Meanwhile, one of the early advocacy movements on date rape in the US was pioneered way back in the 70’s in Delaware. The realization of an organization called Support Group for Victims of Sexual Offense (S.O.S.) founded by then Director of the Health Service Dr. Majorie McKusick was a driving force behind the idea to provide services to survivors of sexual assault. In 1988, SOS produced a brochure dedicated to date rape. At present, bearing a new name, the organization is continuing its efforts to raise awareness on date rape. III. Hypothesis But as to why many people fall on the verge of date rape and as to why individuals commit this crime, remains a broad subject open for discussion. Basing on facts and scientific studies though, leading experts and institutions underwent a series of researches about the topic, some of which have produced fair but contradicting results.   Given the extensive scope of this issue, this paper assumes that risk factors: perceived dating behaviors, external factors (drugs, alcohol), and attitudes of supposed victims and perpetrators constitute likelihood of dating violence and rape. Gravity of the crime Meanwhile, depending on the gravity of the case, non-penetration actions such as touching the private parts of the victim (e.g. buttocks, breasts, genitalia), naked or through clothing constitute an assault but not necessarily rape, albeit, these are detterent to the rape itself. Forcing another individual to touch another person’s private parts even against his/her will also constitute the same.   On the otherhand, the infliction of physical hostility, threats of aggression, or perform sexual contact with an unconscious, asleep, or intoxicated individual describe the force or advantage. Coercion, without the aid of force or hostility is also used such as grave threats, reaveling secrets, put the victim to shame, sack an employee or fail a student are forms of sexual harassment. The Crime scene Actions pertaining to date rapes are reported in strategic areas or venues, depending on the status and preferences of the supposed victim. As the name suggests, the crime usually pointed to locations related to the place of the date or meeting. The assault usually happens in secluded, dark, and private or even public and busy places (e.g. hotels, garden, beach, comfort rooms, cars or club houses). Some cases were reportedly committed in bushy, dark areas away from the human settlements. In the case of college students, date related violence was recorded within the university premises. This is proof to the fact that even the school is not even safe nowadays, more so, it has become a favorite venue for this crime. Commission of rape happens usually in a predictable and definite instance. This can be observed if the prospect is conscious of what is happening around him/her. But in most cases, the motives are already predisposed; hence, timing is of great consideration for the suspects to pursue with the aided or unaided sexual assault and for victims to escape the trap. Even in a promenade or a fair, where people are busy, perpetrators find a leeway to commit rape if not harassment. The targets While many people often think that rape only happens typically to women, this is not always the case. Even men also have experiences of sexual assault. Some even lead to rape, although it occurs frequently within heterosexual dating relationships. This scenario showed that date rape transcends gender, as in the case of people of every ethnicity, age, culture, religion, economic background, or sexual orientation. Just like the opposite sex sexual assault, the majority of same-sex cases occur between people who have close relationships. However, perpetrators as well as the survivors are not always gay or lesbian. Moreover, sexual assault can also be part of a bias crime against someone perceived to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered the perpetrator in this instance can be either the same or opposite sex as the survivor. Although girls and women are the most often victims of rape one in three women will be sexually assaulted in her life, men is also vulnerable to be raped. A study revealed that seven to ten percent of rape victims are male. Meanwhile, teenagers and young adults are four times more likely to be sexually assaulted than women in all other age groups. A USF-Counseling Center for Human Development report showed: that 52% of women students have experienced some form of sexual victimization, 1 in 8 college women have been raped; 1 in 12 college men admitted to sexually abusing women but did not consider themselves rapists; of the women raped, almost 75% didnt identify it as such; 47% of rapes were by first or casual dates or by romantic acquaintances; and over 1/3 of the women didnt discuss the rape with anyone, and over 90% didnt report it to the police. Moreover, in a 1998 Minnesota Student Survey, approximately 9% of girls and 6% of boys had experienced date violence or rape. On the other hand, lifetime prevalence of date or acquaintance rape ranges from thirteen percent to twenty seven percent among college-age women and 20% to a high of 68% among adolescents. VII. Causes and Tendencies As to the cause of becoming a victim and becoming a rapist, an array of results from researches in the last decade revealed that behavior, perception, and external factors confronts both the victim and the perpetrator. On a study conducted on perceived causes of date rape, 142 undergraduates were presented with grids containing 9 causes listed by column and row. They were asked to indicate if they believed there was a causal link between each of the 72 causal pairings. The result placed emphasis on drunkenness, norms of dating, and societys attitude to date rape. Misunderstanding of men’s behavior, male attitude on the unimportance of date rape, and need by males for dominance were seen as prime causes (Bostwick DeLucia, 1992). Demographic characteristics that increase vulnerability to date rape include younger age at first date, early sexual activity, earlier age of menarche, history of sexual abuse or prior sexual victimization, and being more acceptable of rape myths and violence towards women.   Ackard Neumark-Sztainer (2002) on the other hand associated date rape with the higher rates of eating disorder behaviors and suicidal tendencies, and lower scores on emotional well-being and self-esteem scales.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Teenage girls intentionally hurt by a date in the previous date are more likely to experience sexual health risks, including vulnerability to human immunodeficiency virus infection (HIV) and other sexually transmitted infections, or getting pregnant. Dating violence should also be included in reproductive health programs, and greater efforts to identify women experiencing violence while on date are needed among those providing care related to adolescent reproductive health (Silverman, 2004). Other risk factors include date-specific behaviors such as who paid the expenses, who drove, date, location and activity, as well as the use of alcohol or take drugs such as flunitrazepam (Rohypnol) (Rickert Wiemann, 1998). A benzodiazepine with pharmacologic actions is similar to those of diazepam that can cause anterograde amnesia. Some reports showed that it is used as a date rape drug and suggest that it may cause violent behavior. The US government has already banned the importation of this drug which was introduced in 1984. Alcohol consumption that occurs within the context of the date can lead to: the misinterpretation of friendly gestures or cues as sexual invitations and the females inability to ward off a potential attack. Kanin (1985) proposed that perpetrators’ deviant sexual behavior has often been portrayed as the result of frustrated but legitimate sexual exhaustion. This study of the perpetrators reveals that as a product of a hypersexual socialization process, these men are sexually active, aspiring, and successful. Due to an exaggerated desire levels viewed as responsible for instituting a high degree of sexual disappointment, this acute relative deficit is a significant process reponsible for the rape episodes. VIII. Interventions   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Dating violence happens among teemagers which bears common and unique risk factors for dating violence found across adolescents grouped by sex, race/ethnicity, and prior victimization. Rickert, et. al., (2002) described that efforts to lessen dating violence should (1) increase the use of screening tools that measure victimization as well as contextual parameters that will promote promote dating violence; (2) increase self-efficacy to promote safer sex; (3) reduce the use/abuse of alcohol and other drugs that facilitate dating violence; and (4) eliminate the influence of negative peer behavior. Interventions to prevent dating violence will likely also lower unwanted pregnancy rates, HIV-AIDS, and sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s)among young people.. Old town beliefs of a woman being unable to rape another woman and a man with another man these make survivors hard to find someone to talk to, avail services, or even believe themselves that they were raped. Survivors of assault by a same-sex partner or date may face various fears such as homophobia and heterosexist attitudes when disclosing the sexual ordeal or receive medical or psychologicalinterventions.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Van Wie’s 1995 study on resistance to rape showed that participants in the category with perceived resistance conditions took a longer time to identify when the subject should abstain from pursuing sexual contact, thereby exposing them more to be raped.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Results of this study could be used to promote level of awareness on date rape, educate people about the risks and responses with date rape, and to strengthen rules regarding proper sexual behavior. Conclusion   Research designs and materials are needed to advance our our knowledge and understanding of sexual violence among teenagers and the most effective ways to eliminate it. Understanding and comparing research findings would be easier if consensus regarding the definitions of date rape, sexual aggression, and sexual assault was obtained. Finally, prevention programs on primary and secondary date and acquaintance rape must be enhanced and be subjected to systematic evaluation (Rickert Wiemann, 1998) Almost sixty percent of victims who experienced rape and attempted rape disclosed this information to one or more individuals, whereas only 47% of those who experienced verbally coerced sex told another person. Rickert, et. al., (2005) observed that alcohol addiction and a shorter dating history are important variables related with disclosure of rape/attempted rape as well as the time for disclosure. Meanwhile, factors affecting the disclosure of verbally coerced sex and the latency associated with it are less well defined A present survey based on 70% returns of a random sample of 200 women at one college indicated that, although 5% had been date raped, none reported the rapes to authorities due to feelings of self-blame and embarrassment. Rape scenarios that were not reported could perpetuate a self-fulfilling prophecy that rapes do not occur. A victim of rape may feel she is the only one against the world and is reluctant to exclude one’s self who will report. However, this denial by both victims and authorities does not encourage programs for prevention and treatment (Finkelson Oswalt, 1995). Increasing identification of the incidence of date/acquaintance rape (DAR) in the US, especially among women in college, has led to an understanding that the techniques needed to ward off attacks from acquaintances differ from the techniques used to prevent rape by strangers. This study proved and validated the following DAR constructs: perceived vulnerability, self-efficacy, relational priority which is neglecting self-interest to save a relationship, rape myth acceptance (believing myths about rape which makes women avoid facing their own vulnerability), and commitment to self-defense. These constructs were also correlated with scales for masculinity, self-esteem, and degree of belief in a just world. Finally, date and acquaintance rape is not only a womans issue. Men must also be actively aware of this issue, as they can help minimize rape by educating themselves and others. â€Å"Healthy relationships involve respect including respect for the feelings of others. Someone who really cares about you will respect your wishes and not force or pressure you to have sex.†          References:    Finkelson, L., Oswalt, R. (1995). College date rape: incidence and reporting. Psychol Rep, 77(2), 526. Kanin, E. J. (1985). Date rapists: differential sexual socialization and relative deprivation. Arch Sex Behav, 14(3), 219-231. Rickert, V. I., Wiemann, C. M., Vaughan, R. D. (2005). Disclosure of date/acquaintance rape: who reports and when. J Pediatr Adolesc Gynecol, 18(1), 17-24. Silverman, J. G., Raj, A., Clements, K. (2004). Dating violence and associated sexual risk and pregnancy among adolescent girls in the United States. Pediatrics, 114(2), e220-225. Walsh, J. F., Devellis, B. M., Devellis, R. F. (1997). Date and acquaintance rape. Development and validation of a set of scales. Violence Against Women, 3(1), 46-58.

Public Service Essay Example for Free

Public Service Essay Public service is has long been considered to play a key role in the improvement of social and economic development in any countries (ILO, 1996). For this case, the type of public service presented is somehow very effective in terms of sending the correct procedure to the individuals who need such task assistance. For the children of the day care canter, the time frame of Friday is best suited for public service since this might be the busiest day for such an institution. Considering that most of the students may be too excited for the coming weekend. Therefore, having a persons or group of person assist them in their activities in class can provide a worthwhile experience.   Also, the schedule 3:00 to 5:00 pm is a very good choice since afternoon schedules are somehow more lenient in accepting additional work when all other important activities have been prioritized earlier in the day.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   The public service type of task with two types of activity based schedule is also a very good choice. The kids will be able to choose the type of activities they want to be engaged with which will make them more independent and will acquire a greater sense of responsibility. The first hour lets them listen and read to the story while having an option to still play. On another hour, homework assistance is also available which will make the time very productive. If ever they opt to first do their homework with the public servant, they will have more time to enjoy the rest of the day and probably the whole weekend playing. Overall, the type of public service program is very much adapted to the lifestyle of the student in the day care center setting.   References ILO. 1996. Public Service Background. Retrieved December 7, 2007 from http://www.ilo.org/public/english/dialogue/sector/sectors/pubserv.htm.

Anne Bradstreet The Puritan Poet English Literature Essay

Anne Bradstreet The Puritan Poet English Literature Essay Anne Bradstreet was a puritan poet in the 17th century. She experienced hardships throughout her life, but she did the best she could to live by God. She often expressed her thoughts and emotions throughout her poetry. In terms of puritan ideals Bradstreets poetry closely reflected her personal faith in God and the kingdom. Anne Bradstreet was born in Northampton, England in 1612. Her father, Thomas Dudley, was a puritan, but Bradstreet loved to read and seemed to be drawn to the puritan world herself. At the age of 16 she married Simon Bradstreet who was also a puritan. As a child she found much comfort in reading the scriptures. However, during her childhood Bradstreet experienced many moments of ill health. And as an adult, she gave birth to eight children, but only one survived. In spite of her hardships Bradstreet continued on her journey to authorship. Puritanism back then was considered to be a way of life. Its ideal may be best expressed as living in the world without actually being a part of it. A puritan remained strict with morals, and their religion. Puritans believed it was necessary to to live on the earth, and abide by the laws given, but kept in mind that eventually this world would pass. So, that meant the puritans tried to contain a balance between this world and the next. There was no way to safely turn their back on the world since God had created it, and found it to be good. But they could not rely on the security of an earthly world either. However, just as any imperfect human being would, Bradstreet struggled to maintain her faith at times by rebelling and submitting. But just because she may have had doubts did not make her any less of a puritan. She expressed these feelings in poetry as well discussing struggles between her love for this world, and reliance on the next. This was not an attempt for rebelliousness but her attempt of achieving the puritan way of life. Bradstreet not only wrote about events that occurred in her life, but she wrote about the people in it. For example, the poems about her husband whom she loved very much. In To My Dear and Loving Husband, Bradstreet wrote about the love for her husband but created it to be in harmony with the love for God. Puritans were taught that if a husband and wife did not express love towards each other than they disobeyed God. In the last 2 lines The heavens reward thee manifold I pray. Then while we live, in love lets so persevere. That when we live no more, we may live ever (105 Daly). In these lines she expresses her obedience to God, and how she looks to him. She is determined to maintain love in her marriage until the day they die no matter what they may face. Therefore, when they do pass, they will meet in heaven and be together forever. In A Letter to Her Husband, Absent Upon Public Employment Bradstreet wrote about what her husbands love meant to her. Not only does she use symbolism, but she uses a metaphysical approach. In this poem her husband is absent, and she misses him dearly. She goes on to describe how lonely she feels without him, and compares herself to being like the earth without a sun. For her, he is like the sun providing warmth, so without him she is cold and numb. In Upon the Burning of our House Bradstreet shows a brief attachment to materialism, and realizes if it was meant to be then so be it. In this poem her house has burnt down, and she is feeling down. In the beginning she is observing everything that will no longer be used. But she does not lose faith, and keeps in mind that God has the power to give and take as he pleases. Therefore, she puts all her trust in God that he can and will provide for her. In The Author to Her Book Bradstreet wrote of her own faults. She is honest of pointing out her own flaws. I believe the poem is about her work being ready to be published, and seen by others, but she is not ready. She is supposed to have the pure image of a puritan, but she may have fallen short in some areas. Bradstreet feels like she is going to be judged by all, and it is not going to be positive feedback. The tone of the poem is frustration and worry. I cast thee by as one unfit for lightà ¢Ã¢â€š ¬Ã‚ ¦Thy blemishes amend, if so I co uld: I washed thy face, but more defects I saw, and rubbing of a spot, still made a flaw. I stretched thy to joints to make thee even feet, yet still thou runst more hobbling than is meet (102 George Perkins). However, in the Prologue, Bradstreet wrote about herself and her limitations as a woman. Bradstreet is proud of who she is, and what she has become. But she does not forget how women are viewed differently, and how men may judge her as a woman trying to be a poet. Other women in England seemed to have the same attitude and feelings of their sex. Why cant they be looked upon as equals? Bradstreet just expressed herself more bluntly than most. A sense of pride and belief in herself was required if she wanted to become known as a poet in the 17th century. She expresses this in Who says my hand a needle better fits, A poets pen all scorn I should thus wrong, For such despite they cast on female wits (10 Watts). In Bradstreets works she displays a sense of spirituality, but in others she seems to be her own judge. She realizes herself, her flaws and where she falls short. Over all, she kept her faith pretty well. Work Cited Bercovitch, Sacvan. The American Puritan Imagination. Cambridge University Press 1974. 107- 108. Daly, Robert. Gods Altar: The World and the Flesh In Puritan Poetry. University of California Press 1978. 93, 100, 104, 106-107. Perkins, George. The American Literature. 12th Ed. McGraw-Hill 2009. 92-92. Watts Stripes Emily. Poetry of American Women from 1632 to 1945. University of Texas Press 1977. 10-12.

history of s. africa :: essays research papers fc

INTRODUCTION:   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   In this paper I will be talking about the history of South Africa and how it was segregated and how apartheid came about and give some acts that were used in order to segregate. I talk about the ANC and how the â€Å"white† government outlawed it. I will also show how the apartheid became a thing of the past and was accepted by the new government in order to make peace and bring unity. CREATION: The National Party went into power in 1948 to strengthen â€Å"white Supremacy†. The National Party made it obvious to the public that it identified this political, economic and social policy with the ideology of ‘apartheid’. They immediately made laws that gave apartheid a legislative reality, which could not be overturned easily. These laws separated whites and blacks and formed the theory that whites should be treated more favorably than blacks.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  The Population Act of 1950 was the beginning for separating South Africa’s population into different races. There were only three different races and they were white, coloured and Bantu (black). This act helped pave the way for other acts that were strictly developed to separate whites and blacks. Listed below are just few of the acts:  ·Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  The Group Area Act- mapped out areas that were â€Å"black free†  ·Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Mixed Marriage Act- made it illegal for whites and blacks to marry  ·Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  The Immorality Act- made it illegal for whites and blacks to have sexual relations  ·Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Separate Representation of Voters Amendment Act- made it mandatory that their could only be white representatives when it came to politics The National Party gained a tremendous amount of support from the white electorate. The National Party, which has five-year terms, was re-elected in 1953 and in 1958, which promoted segregation more and more.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  While this is going on, the African National Congress (ANC) is fighting for the rights of black people. They were having many boycotts, sit-ins and walking to work instead of having to pay for a ride. While demonstrating in front of a police station in 1960, police fired on demonstrators killing sixty-seven and injuring one hundred eighty-six. A peaceful march took place a while later with 30,000 joined, but led to the arrest of over 18,000 of them. Leaders of the ANC were also arrested, including Nelson Mandela.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Prohibited from operating peacefully in South Africa, the ANC established underground organizations in 1961 to continue their struggle with the government. The ANC bombed police stations and power plants, but was very careful not to take any lives.

Music as Clay :: Composers Musical Essays

Music as Clay In our study of Bach, we have seen how he was able to take traditional, sacred texts and write accompaniments for them that capture the meaning of those texts in a very unique way. Bach had the power to write music that was so expressive that it could actually make the listener feel what the text was saying. This power of Bach's music is often overlooked in our society, because the modern human culture it quick to judge the beauty of music. By doing this, we fail to hear the truths Bach wrote. The following is a close study of how Bach was able to combine text and harmonies in one specific movement of his Cantata No. 78 to express certain messages. Bach's tenor aria (movement 4) in Cantata No. 78 is a good example of how Bach uses the expressive power of text, harmonies, and instrumentation to speak to his audiences and really say things through his music. This way, he was able to make music not only more powerful, but more accessible. One way Bach uses Movement 4 to speak to the audience is through the form and tonal structure of the piece. Movement 4 is a binary aria with the text split evenly into a three-line A section and a three-line B section. The opening ritornello is in g minor, and the piece stays in g minor until the last cadence of the A section. The second ritornello is in Bb major followed by the B section, which moves from Bb major through many other keys and eventually ends up back in g minor. Then the final ritornello is also played in g minor. The form Bach has chosen seems, from the conventions mentioned by Crist, to be an irregular form for the text given. It is a very short text that could easily be repeated in the da capo form, but Bach must have chosen this form for another reason. Perhaps he was trying to accentuate more on the meaning of the words rather than portray its poetic sound. The actual meaning of the words do not really seem to fit well with a da capo form. The first three lines talk of how Jesus makes the heart light and the spirit free. Thus, a freer style makes sense. Also, the last three lines talk of how Jesus brings victory over the "Lord of Hell", so ending the song after that last line can somehow be paralleled to the victory.

Friends Essay -- essays papers

Friends Friends are a necessity in every child’s life. They are there to comfort, to laugh with, and to create wonderful memories. All of a sudden a child grows up and gets thrown into college. His or her friends go to other colleges, and they both realize that they aren’t going to have those close friendships anymore. It has happened many times before, and it will happen many times again. What one needs to know is that college isn’t a place to mope around; it is a place to rejoice and meet new people. College is a place where one develops skills in meeting new people and creating new friendships. This skill is not just learned and then lost. It is a skill that can be used anywhere and any time thought life. The hardest part is to get the ball rolling and start meeting new people. College is not a difficult place to meet people. They are everywhere; in dorms, in classrooms, and simply walking around outside. Although this is a perfect atmosphere for meeting people, some may still have difficulty. The greatest challenge about meeting people is not only the hoping that...

Stay at Home Mom

â€Å"Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, â€Å"She doesn't have what it takes. †Ã‚   They will say, â€Å"Women don't have what it takes. †Ã‚  Being a stay at home mother has its benefits but it most definitely has its flaws. In the old days women had no choice but to stay at home; cooking, cleaning, making sure dinner was ready on time. They had no say if they wanted to work or finish school. Just imagine living day to day in the same routine. Visualize waking up at 6:30 am making the beds, then breakfast and that kiss goodbye before he went to work.At first this must feel amazing spending all this time with your child bonding and not missing a moment. But where’s your me time? 4 out of 5 mothers are happier when they work. They can have adult conversations and take a sick day. Being a stay at home mom is a 24-hour, 7-day-a-week job with no pay. What woman wants to feel financially dependent of her spouse? â€Å"I see my husband once a week. But since he is making the bulk of the income, I can't really be resentful about that. At the same time, I feel like we have two separate lives. † In this day and age budgets are tighter than usual. Why add on to your stress with bills and payments.It’s true that you might miss out on your child’s first word or first steps but absence makes the heart grow fonder. You can’t be a stay at home mom forever. What will you do with your free time when your child starts school? In most cases the child grows too attached to their mom and doesn’t have enough communication skills to share with other kids. Daycare has evolved because you can go to work and your child learns how to play others. Children become more independent and self-reliant when they don't have you there to do everything for them, which is better for both of you in the long run.You lose a lot of your freedom because your child has to go everywhere with you even the bathroom. When you need time to cook or just take a breather who’s to say you won’t just place your child in front of the TV for an hour. Women fought for the opportunity to be as equal as men especially in the job area. We are not less of a mother for thinking of ourselves a little. This shows your child to be strong and independent. Your child will grow attached to you but you will also be more attached to your child. What happens when college comes along and your baby is leaving you. What will you do with all that time, Knit, bake, read.You’ll go mad and feel abandoned. You won’t have the skills you did when you were working. Not to say that one is easier than the other they both take a lot of effort. After you work you’ll be exhausted and trying to find time for your kid and husband. You will feel pressured to make the time you do have with your kid’s quality time, so you can actually overwhelm them. As a stay at home mom you w ill have time to clean and more time with friends and family. But overall the extra effort is worth it. Woman will feel more accomplished in their life’s and have a sense of purpose.